Crock Pot Coq au Vin

Before the birth of my newest child, I spent a great deal of time cooking and freezing food.  If you follow this blog you already know this.  I have a good recipe for coq au vin, as well as a new one from a Good Housekeeping cookbook that's cooked in a crock pot.  It was a giant cooking conundrum.  I know and love my recipe for coq au vin, but thought that since it is slow-cooked in the oven, wouldn't a crock pot work just as well or better?  My gut told me not to fool with the French and use a Dutch oven.  But laziness overruled and I decided to go with the crock pot recipe instead.

Crock Pot Coq au Vin

3 slices bacon, cut crosswise into 3/4-inch pieces
1 package (10-oz) mushrooms, cut in half
2 cups frozen pearl onions
1 cut-up chicken (4 lbs) skin removed from all pieces except wings
1/2 tsp salt
1/4 tsp ground black pepper
1 medium onion, chopped
1 large carrot, chopped
4 cloves garlic, chopped
1 cup dry red wine
2 tbsp tomato paste
1 bay leaf
3/4 cup chicken broth

1.  In a 12-inch nonstick skillet, cook bacon over medium heat until browned.  With slotted spoon, transfer bacon to paper towels to drain; set aside.

2.  Meanwhile, in a 5- to 6-quart slow cooker, combine mushrooms and frozen pearl onions; set aside.

3.  Sprinkle chicken with salt and pepper.  In skillet with bacon fat, cook chicken (in 2 batches, if necessary) over medium-high heat until browned, 10 minutes.  Place chicken over vegetables in slow cooker.

4.  Discard drippings from skillet.  Reduce heat to medium; add onion and carrot, and cook 2 minutes or until onion softens, stirring frequently.  Stir in garlic and cook 1 minute.  Add wine, tomato paste, and bay leaf; heat to boiling, stirring to dissolve tomato paste.  Pour wine mixture and broth over low setting 8 hours or on high setting 4 hours.

5.  To serve, discard bay leaf.  With large spoon, transfer chicken and sauce to deep platter; sprinkle with bacon.

The Verdict:  Damn it!  I hate crock pots!

The funniest part of this story is that I made a double batch.  And, of course, all that chicken didn't fit in my crock pot so I borrowed a second one from my friend across the hall.  So I've got dueling crock pots going in my kitchen, taking up half my counter space.  Now, the reason I was so hesitant to use the crock pot in the first place was because it turns to a giant vat of liquid.  Coq au vin is not supposed to be a broth-based soup.  So I prepared myself: I did research and learned that to reduce liquid you should put your crock pot on high for the last hour and cook with the lid off. 

Did it work?  Of course not!

This means that I'm standing in front of my stove, covered in sweat, while ladling cup after cup of liquid into roux to form a sauce.  Which was so convenient. 

After making the sauce, the finished product was delicious.  Lots of flavors with nice, moist chicken.  But unless you're willing to create the sauce "by hand," I wouldn't try this recipe.  Or use it and cook it in the oven instead.  While the crock pot allows you to leave the house, it also doesn't make real coq au vin, which kind of defeats the purpose.

We have a giant bag of this left in the freezer and I'm looking forward to digging into it.  But I'll certainly think about my loathing for crock pots the entire time I eat it.  Harumph.

Crock Pot Chicken Pasta

Wow.  Now that I'm nearing the end of this pregnancy, I'm really relying on the crock pot.  But don't get it twisted; I'm not singing its praises.  I'm still not sure how much I love his device.  Still, it makes an easy, hot meal that I don't have to mess around too much with. 

So that's why I decided to give this chicken pasta recipe a try.  It's again from Fix-It and Forget-It, Our Best Slow Cooker Recipes 2010 which claimed that this was a "kid-friendly" meal.  That didn't hurt when choosing it, though of course my son's current pickiness isn't easily quelled by a label. 

Chicken Pasta

1 1/2 lbs boneless chicken breasts, cut into 1-inch cubes
1 large zucchini, diced
1-oz envelope chicken gravy mix
2 tbsp water
2 tbsp evaporated milk or whipping cream
1 large tomato, chopped
4 cups cooked macaroni
8 oz smoked Gouda cheese, shredded

1.  Place chicken in slow cooker.

2.  Add zucchini, gravy mix, and water.  Stir.

3.  Cover and cook on high 1 hour and then on low 4 hours.

4.  Add milk and tomato.  Cover and cook on low 20 minutes more.

5.  Stir in pasta.  Top with cheese.  Serve immediately.

The Verdict:  Reminds me of tuna noodle casserole.  And before you clap your hands in glee that I'm telling you it's a comfort food, let me tell you about tuna noodle casserole.

My mom used to make it about twice a year.  And quite a few times I talked them into letting me watch The Brady Bunch reruns on tuna noodle night.  While the Brady's doled out advice like, "Mom always said, don't play ball in the house!" I would surreptitiously scrape my plate behind the couch because my dog wouldn't eat the stuff.

So when I took my first bite or two and thought of tuna noodle casserole, I knew I'd hate it.  And a few bites more confirmed it.  My son hated it, too.  My husband thought it was fine, but this is the guy who, when we first started dating, told me over the phone he was eating his dinner of cereal and milk powder.  He's come a long way, baby.

I'm not saying you wouldn't like it.  I'll bet it really does have a homey, comfort food appeal to some people.  For me, something about the grittiness of the chicken and the gravy, the creaminess of the the cream and the hot macaroni just doesn't do it for me.  All together, it makes me...want to scrape it behind my couch.  But since I'm the one who'd have to clean it up, I probably won't.  I just won't make it again.

Cumin-Cayenne Blackened Fish

Here's another one from Cooking Light.  A few weeks ago I'd made a picatta with flounder and bought two packages of fish, unsure of how much was in each.  Turns out, it had eight thin fillets in each.  Which isn't problematic, as we all like fish in my family.  But with a package of fish in the freezer, I needed to find something to do with it, and voilà, it was this.  The original recipe says tilapia, but I say use what white, flaky fish floats your boat.  Take that, fishmongers.

Cumin-Cayenne Blackened Fish

1 tbsp olive oil
4 (6-oz) tilapia fillets
2 tsp ground cumin
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp garlic powder
1/2 tsp ground red pepper
1/4 tsp freshly ground black pepper
Cooking spray

1.  Preheat broiler.

2.  Rub olive oil evenly over fish.  Combine cumin, salt, garlic powder, and peppers; sprinkle evenly over fish.  Arrange fish on a broiler pan coated with cooking spray; broil 5 minutes or until fish flakes easily when tested with a fork or desired degree or doneness.

The Verdict:  OK, couple problems with this recipe.  Well, mainly one.

I read, but it didn't compute, that it's called cumin-cayenne blackened fish.  Cayenne.  Capsaicin.  Hot.  I cut back on the cayenne for our fish and even wiped it off of my son's fillet.  But even still, three bites into it he declared, "This fish hurts my mouth."  My husband laughed.  How can fish hurt your mouth?  I then laid out the ingredients, to which my darling berated me as a wicked and cruel parent. 

Sigh.

So if your family likes spicy, this recipe will be fine.  If your family prefers one out of four chilies on the spiciness meter on a menu, skip this one. 

Frankly, with or without the argument over too-spicy-for-the-kid, this is not Cooking Light's best recipe.  While it tasted fine, there was nothing at all interesting about it.  It might have been better with a wonderful and fresh fish, but even then, the highlight wouldn't have been the spices.  It would have been the fish. 

Nah.  Good for, "I have fish, what combination of stuff can I throw on top of it?" cooking.  But if you're looking for James Beard Award kudos, keep fishing.

Smoky, Creamy Mac & Cheese

Among some of my friends there is a great debate regarding processed cheese. Some think it should be stripped of its cheese title, while others love its gooey goodness. I'm on the fence because I think that processed cheese has its place. I love it melted on a burger or in scrambled eggs, but at the same time, I'm not going to place it alongside a good Camembert or Gruyere.

So when I came across this Kraft Philadelphia Cream Cheese recipe for Smoky, Creamy Mac & Cheese, I wasn't going to turn my nose up at it just because of its plethora of phony ingredients. (Sorry, Kraft, but you're not being sold in Whole Foods for more reasons than one.) Macaroni and cheese is one of Amir's favorite foods and they had me at the word "smoky." So it was a go in the Kinayman house.

Smoky, Creamy Mac & Cheese

2 cups uncooked elbow macaroni
1/4 cup butter, cubed
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
2 cups 2% milk
1 tub (8 ounces) Philadelphia Chive & Onion Cream Cheese Spread
4 ounces Velveeta Pasteurized Prepared Cheese Product, cut into 1/2-in cubes
1 cup (4 oz) Kraft shredded sharp cheddar cheese
5 Oscar Mayer bacon strips, cooked and crumbled (optional)
1/4 tsp salt
1/8 tsp pepper
1/3 cup Panko breadcrumbs
2 tbsp. butter, melted

COOK macaroni according to package directions. In a large saucepan, melt butter. Stir in flour until smooth, gradually add milk. Bring to a boil; cook and stir for 1-2 minutes or until thickened. Stir in the cream cheese, Velveeta, cheddar cheese, bacon, salt and pepper.

DRAIN macaroni; stir in cheese sauce. Transfer to a greased 8-inch square baking dish. Combine bread crumbs and melted butter; sprinkle over casserole. Bake at 350 degrees for 25-30 minutes until bubbly.

The Verdict: Processed cheese has a place, but this isn't it. None of us were bowled over by it, and that includes Mr. Macaroni and Cheese himself, Amir.

First of all, and this isn't really about the recipe itself, do yourself a favor and find the smallest block of Velveeta you can. This recipe calls for 4 ounces and the only Velveeta they sold at Target was 32 ounces. Holy cow! What am I supposed to do with a cinder block of Velveeta? That is, unless you're in the more is better when it comes to processed cheese camp. Next, the
Velveeta and the cream cheese are salty. Omit the salt! And lastly, you can almost double the amount of pasta. The amount of cheese sauce this recipe makes is shocking. I thought it looked like elbow macaroni swimming in a sea of cheese. It will obviously make a lot. If you choose to make this recipe, make it when you need to bring a covered dish somewhere.

The changes I made to the recipe were omitting the salt and the bacon, using 1% instead of 2% milk, and using whole wheat macaroni.

Meh. I don't think this one is going to become a part of the regular rotation.

A (One Time Only?) Dessert Special

A year or so ago, perhaps longer now, my husband asked what he thought was an innocent question: "Can we throw away your old baking pans? They're in bad shape." I asked if we'd be replacing the pans and he said yes. I wasn't aware that he meant "can we throw away your old baking pans...right now?" It's been frustrating each time I want to cook something and the recipe calls for a pan that I used to have. Or I thought I did, anyway.

That it's taken over a year to just identify what's gone should tell you something. I'm not a baker. I remember watching a holiday special on the Food Network where Paula Deen and Rachel Ray are cooking together. They begin baking a dessert and it begins to dawn on Paula Deen that Rachel Ray has no clue how to bake. She is surprised and horrified. But while I like Paula better than Rachel, I suddenly felt a surge of camaraderie with her. I can't bake either. Try as I might and fantasize as I do, my sugary confections often fall flat--sometimes literally.

So it's rather comical that I was suddenly possessed with the idea of sharing dessert recipes now that I plan to show this blog to others. What can I possibly share with you? My disasters? OK, I can do that easily.

My mother had a large collection of recipe cards that I have no idea where they came from. It doesn't say clearly on the card. But I've kept many over the years because they looked good. One in particular, for brownie ice cream sandwiches, looked especially delicious. A very important kitchen tip I've learned the hard way is to read your recipe well before you try to cook it. I swear I did this. But there were still many parts that made no sense to me. Lining a pan fully with waxed paper? Are you kidding me? It slips out of place. Immediately freeze something that comes out of the oven? That's just weird. But here it is:


Fudgy Brownies & Cream

1/2 cup (1 stick) butter
2 (1 ounce) squares unsweetened chocolate
1 cup sugar
1/2 cup flour
1 tsp vanilla
2 large eggs, beaten
mint chocolate chip ice cream
strawberry ice cream

1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Line two 8x8-inch baking pans with waxed paper.

2. Combine butter and chocolate in a large microwave-safe bowl. Microwave on HIGH, stirring frequently, until chocolate is melted, about 1 1/4 minutes. Stir well to mix.

3. Add sugar, flour and vanilla extract to chocolate mixture and mix well. Let stand to cool slightly. Add eggs and mix well. Spoon mixture into the prepared baking pans.

4. Bake until set, about 10 minutes. Freeze pans for 5 minutes. Cut each pan of brownies into 9 squares.

5. Place a brownie on each of 9 individual serving plates. Place a scoop of ice cream on each brownie. Place a brownie on top to make a sandwich and serve immediately.

The Verdict: Disaster.

Oh! Now I know where my mom got those recipes: Shitty Recipes for You Monthly Magazine. As you now know, my pan selection is less than stellar. I borrowed the second pan from my friend and neighbor Deanne, only to learn that I didn't even have a pan. Fine. I'd make the brownies in two batches. I bake the brownies for the suggested time and when I take them out of the oven, I decide to take them out of the pan and cool them on a plate. Except that they rolled lethargically out of the pan in a chocolate tube.

After I pressed them back into a brownie shape, I realized these were nowhere near a brownie consistency. Not even a fudgy brownie. They were more like tightly packed brown sugar. So I poured the rest of the brownie mixture on top of the pressed brownies and baked it all for an additional 20 minutes. I thought that maybe I could cut the brownie in half and put the ice cream in that way, but the result was greasy, thin brownies. At that point I gave up and we ate them like that for dessert.